the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
Heard I spat fire in your face last night. Wish I could say that I'm sorry
House vote, we're revoking your 151 privileges
I'm sorry.
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
Randomize
