Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
Have you ever been so weak from sleep you couldn't push your poo out?
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
Your job is getting in the way of our day drinking. Shots on the hour are not as cool alone.
No, I left myself a half eaten cucumber and a beer next to my head, pointed at it and said 'you're breakfast' and then passed out.
I AM A HOUSE CAT. I CANNOT DO THIS LION BUSINESS WE CALL THE SINGLE LIFE
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
He kept trying to make out with me but I was just trying to show him Shrek memes
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
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