So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
Why did you put hummus in my pillow case?
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
She said, and I quote "how do you run with something that big between your legs".
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
im trying to look as sober as possible but i just poured orange juice and mayo into my milkshake.
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
That moment when your whole family facetimed you just moments before you threw up all over the entire living room
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
Randomize
