this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
THERE IS WEED IN MY OVEN. HOW AM I EVER SUPPOSED TO MAKE CHICKEN PARMESAN WITH WEED IN MY OVEN.
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
Your drunk self managed to not pee on anyone's bed
Go me
I'm actually proud
So a bottle of lube exploded all over my softball bag and Nike shirt.
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