are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
I ran into his family and they made me a ham sandwich and I asked if they wanted to come streaking. I felt they deserved the invite.
WEED IS MY SPIRIT ANIMAL
That one probably shouldn't have been in caps
I just hit your bf in the face with a mustard bottle and the guy at the table next to us bowed down to me.
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
All I’ve had today is sex and water. I think it’s time for tacos.
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
I'm going to come in the middle of the night and attack you with spoons
Randomize
