i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
I wish there was a facebook app that filtered my notifications to show only the ones having to do with people who'll fuck me.
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
I remembered to bring wine in a nalgene bottle, but I forgot sunscreen and water. I'm starting to question my life decisions.
... Already stepped in vomit and got a dirty look from a fat in a neck brace
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
Is it sad or funny that I just bought two pregnancy test at the dollar store to give away to people on New Year's Eve while driving for Uber.
Randomize
