Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
I've been laying here all day wondering why my back hurt so bad and then I remembered last night.... When you pushed me through that glass table.
All I know is that I'm not gonna send out SOS messages via twitter for your rescue this time.
Remember that time you bought snap bracelets on Amazon and they sent you 300 pregnancy tests instead? Amazon knows.
I told her the party couldn't handle my playlist LAZERBAWLS and I was right. Cops in the basement, orgy in the kitchen, jousting in the living room.
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
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