oh god the rape fog is back!
Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
He keeps trying to sell me the forks from his kitchen drawer
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
Turns out the owner of the bar that I fucked used to be on Boy Meets World, but now he's old and bald. So there's that..
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
Randomize
