NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
my shit smells like andre
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
Well this lady at the bar told me I was a natural on the tambourine and that it was my God given talent. and then she gave me a tambourine.
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
but like who hasn’t gotten fingered at the state fair?
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
Randomize
