Um, that's called prostitution
Not if I leave it on the nightstand, then it's called cab money
I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
You know how I know he's a virgin? He's wearing transition lenses.
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
You were so drunk you tried to sell your salsa to everyone on the restaurant.
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
I only get hit on by people going through their midlife crisis. Yes, I did purposely write that gender neutral.
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
That's really the only reason I'm dating you, the prospect that I might get bacon
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
when some dude came up to you and said he didn't like your shirt you just looked at him and firmly asked if he really thought that you gave a fuck.
You took your shirt off at the bar, handed it to a girl, and made her wash your dirty shirt on your washboard abs
tuesdays get the best of me...
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