doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
My mom seriously just told me my insurance company pays for rehab. In an email. I expect a real, not just us joking, intervention coming on. I'm not accepting a "lunch date" with that bitch.
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
i was beyond wasted so he tucked me into bed and wrapped the blankets around me like a burrito. then gave me a bloody mary and an omlet when i woke up. and who says living with your cousin is a bad thing?!
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
I definitely think in addition to buying paint ball guns this summer we should invest in a breathalyzer. That way every drunk night turns into a competition, who can blow over the legal limit more. The loser gets shot while hungover. Shit goes hand in hand if you ask me.
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
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