So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
I feel like I've been hit by a train. I woke up this morning covered in wine, free condoms, and a sign language dictionary.
whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
eggs and jello shots do not qualify as 'brunch'
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
I'm just sitting here drunk and eating peas because my life sucks
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
You know tonight's gonna be a good night when your already planning on sleeping in a trunk
You’re going to be a doctor, and I’m going to be a trophy wife. We both have goals
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