i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
you wouldn't come out from under your bed because you said there were six-armed bears everywhere.
ohhh that explains the pepperonis I found in my sock drawer this morning...
no it doesn't.
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
Then you fell out of your chair, looked right at me and said, "You are sooo drunk."
Randomize
