Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
only you would end up drunk at a subway with a one-eyed homeless man
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
If you're receiving this text it's probably because I drunkenly flashed you on Saturday. Sorry for forcing you to look at my tits. That was uncalled for.
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
I just want to sit my fat ass down at McDonald's and never leave
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
This friendship isnt goin to work if you dont respond to my drunk texts
Randomize
