grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
i woke up next to a ladle and a packet of chocolate biscuits that my face had melted into one giant biscuit.
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
He's living a porn movie. He's slept with a waitress at her work for lunch, a bar tender at the bar that night, and the cleaning lady the next morning.
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
I was out of weed and my vibrator broke, so I'm now at Red Lobster.
I told my coworker that I'd get him some edibles because he wants to rekindle his marriage. I'd better get some good karma out of this.
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
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