And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
i feel like someone uncorked me like a wine bottle and pulled a living animal outta my arse.
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
There was a stripper pole on the party bus. Was being past tense because some fat chick somehow tore it from the ceiling while grinding
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
Randomize
