who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
We got Pizza Hut & Papa Johns, delivered within seconds of each other, and both delivery people did a shot. I was put on Earth for this moment.
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
Mike passed out early so we kept filling his mouth with redi-whip and letting the dog lick it out, but he started getting hives so we stopped.
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
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