Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
Apparently I taped knives to my hands and made everyone call me wolverine
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
Randomize
