lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
You asked me to be the big spoon, when you passed out on the stairs
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
Remembering I sold my brand new Blackberry to a stranger for a few pints = Worst night of my life. Now to work out what I did with my shoes.
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
Your shirt... Was in my pants
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
Randomize
