You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
also, i may or may not be wearing a cape right now. hint: i am.
i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
One of my students just told me turtles are lazy and need to get a job. Fuck yes, my job here is done.
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
I actively tried geting in the guy's pants and ended up in the girl's. I'm bad at this whole straight while drunk thing.
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
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