i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
After last night, I could never be a politician.
but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop.
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
Randomize
