Last-second stop at the drug store for lube and condoms. Clerk said "So uhmmm...that's a done deal, huh?"
High five!
i just saw a man dusting the fake palm trees at the mall
...welcome to nebraska
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
You were laying in bed whispering and crying to the half eaten burrito saying "why am I shitting so much" and "what did I do to deserve this"
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
Oh god. Just tried to hail a pizza delivery car. Awkward.
International sake day = success
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
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