he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
I feel bad for her, but I feel like she's one of those resource-raping alien civilizations that visits planets, decimates them and then leaves. Those really aren't the qualities I appreciate in a friend. Ya know?
People were staring and acting all judgmental and offended... Like they've never seen anyone breastfeed in a liquor store.
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
I had to replace her wine with red vitamin water. So if she’s alive, you can thank me
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
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