If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
i was drunk enough to give the cab driver my number when he said "you talk like you like guys"
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
That's what my new years consisted of. Consoling heartbroken girls and having people throw up in my hands.
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
Dude I may be rolling but there's no way I can make up a 12 ft tall giant green man waving to me right now
False alarm, security just told me it's a radio tower
Apparent my drunk ass was so dedicated to taking a piss, when I walked across the dance floor to get to the bathroom a 9/10 broad tried to dance with me and I just pushed her aside, like hard enough to send her a few feet from where she was standing, pointed at her and said "Not now chief, gotta rock a mean one."
Randomize
