Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
Randomize
