So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
I will be naked everywhere
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
My uterus is doing all sorts of karate moves to break free of my body.
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
Fuck my life he IS a stripper, Ive been sleeping with a stripper named Phoenix. damnit, I knew the sex was too good
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
And now, by the power vested in me by the state of intoxication, I now pronounce you fucking awesome.
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
Randomize
