You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
You passed out in the bathroom with the door locked. Had to take a shit in your litter box. Don't worry, your cat buried it for me.
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
Jesus christ. I put you on speaker when you called me last night and you told me to brush my teeth with a dick.
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
Was not aware that standing loudly up off the couch and loudly, drunkenly slurring "I'M EIGHTEEN NOW BITCHES" counted as a primitive mating call.
Randomize
