I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
Today's lesson: while in the shower, one should choose between either drinking OR shaving. Not both.
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
I SHIT YOU NOT a mailman helped me leave without waking him up.
I got a blow torch for Christmas. You are now permitted to be afraid.
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
Twas still the Saturday before Christmas \nAnd it’s still fucking snowing\nAnd Steve wished he slowed down \nOn all the fucking drinking
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
Randomize