The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
It's really awkward to greet the pastor when I know I've licked chocolate syrup off his daughter's chest.
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
Im about to embark on a date with someone who shit in my car. How did this become my life?
How do you tell someone who's buying a pregnancy test to have a nice day .... Like how
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
I just dropped a paperclip into my cleavage while talking to the company president... That's an awkward moment.
Did you at least offer to let him get it out??
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
A girl in McDonalds just asked if I was in here wasted a few nights ago throwing fries at the staff, I said it was my twin
We both know that wasn't me
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
Randomize
