Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
i'm surprised you didn't wake up. like i literally came when he was fingering me as i was spooning with you and all you did was mumble "that's a good idea, mom" and pull the sheets away from me.
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
You peed in the sink and kept shouting "I'm the black swan! Ca-caw!"
How long do I have to listen to him talk about the chickens before telling him I just really want to fuck? Note: it's already been twelve minutes.
He’s going to a lawnmower race. I got a Brazilian and he’s racing a lawnmower race. Pick me up. I’m not wasting this waxing on John Deer
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