is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
Just discovered i ordered the nhl center ice package back in september, the operator said there was a note next to the time I called, indicating I may have been intoxicated while calling (no clue why but it was noted)...meaning I was drunk...meaning ill never miss another sabres game...i love me and am beaming with self pride
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
You can't hold me to anything I said last night; I was drunk on orgasms.
Randomize
