it hurts more in the daytime
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
He hasn't left the hospital without a nurse's number all year. My nurses are always ugly or men. Wtf bro
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
We mailed him an 18 inch double headed dildo for his birthday. The Fedex guys certainly got a laugh out of it.
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
Randomize
