Charged a drink to your name last night. Thanks for the whiskey
I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
Is adulthood just morning sex and then walking through the grocery store 20 min later looking for something to take to work for lunch?
...and then running into your dad at said grocery store...
I'm pretty sure I just discovered what the American Dream is said the person eating a hotdog for breakfast in bed in her underwear
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
Randomize
