When my kids ask how I lost my virginity Im going to have to tell them of a mythical thing called "Myspace" and how strangers could lure you into their "den of love" thanks to clever quotes and graphics
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
Someone broke into my car and stole it then left me $300 to pay for the damages with a lovely note that said "we just couldn't pass up the boxed wine... Sorry about the window."
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
So help me God.... if he sends me a dick pic.... I will make it so he has to eat food through a tube in his nose and poop into a bag by his belly button
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
Randomize