I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
you never know when you'll meet the man of your dreams and bang him in an elevator
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
Dear vodka that I hid in a water bottle in the backseat of Blairs car, I'm sorry that she gave you away to a man on side of the road with an over heated engine. I'm sure the car doesn't appreciate you as much as I would have.
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
Boob shaped ice luge is ordered for my bday. Boom
I can't even drink.
The liquor comes out the nipples. Out. The. Nipples.
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
i like him enough to wash my sheets.. but not enough to finally get that pink lemonade and vodka slushy stain out of my carpet
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
Randomize
