Really stoned
just sent my roommate on a cheese run
you tried to arm wrestle for the title of "mom's favorite son"
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
OMG. Hung over at my grandparents house. Threw up on 3 T-stops, countless snowbanks, and the grandparents driveway. Was proposed to last night. Bruised from head to toe from falling down 3 flights of stairs. Debating my intelligence because it seems that "happy new years" is too hard for me to spell. How were your new years festivities?
After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin.
Chang gave me a 1.5 gallon beer tasting cup, i have a new boyfriend with a huge stick, Members of the Irish Rugby team slapped my ass and cheered for firmness, and a couple of strangers are naming the child after me. Best. Weekend.Ever.
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
WHAT THE FUCK I JUST PULLED TWO TAMPONS OUT OF MY VAGINA. WHERE DID THE OTHER ONE COME FROM??
....surprise!
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