So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
I mean I'm basically single. Or maybe just an asshole. Either way.
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
I'm sober enough to question why I have your name as "the wolverine" in my phone.
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
How drunk are u on a scale of one to couldn't get it up if u had a gun at ur head?
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
Randomize
