Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
This was my thought process as I drunkenly ran home: Whoa! I'm going so FAST! Why don't I run EVERYWHERE! ALL THE TIME! Then I peed in a bush and passed out on the ground.
So basically you were a dog.
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
How do you tell someone who's buying a pregnancy test to have a nice day .... Like how
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
He told me I smelled like fruit loops and then bit me on the tit
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
Randomize