he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
I just woke up from quarter beer tuesdays wearing 3 pairs of underwear, none of which are the ones I left wearing...2 Around my waist and one around my shoulder in an attempt at a bra. At least drunk me tries to be decent?
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
So vagazzling was a success
Can I borrow your pants?
WTH?
Just come to the men’s room and help me. The blonde bartender figured out I’m married. Rachel will definitely notice if come home pantsless
Randomize
