Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
You cant carve pumpkins without vodka. It's a Halloween tradition.
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
The angle I tried to shoot a load on her face was unfortunate. I accidentally came on the David Bowie tribute she had out. Oddly, that made it more erotic.
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
You know that tattoo place next to Dallas? The naked sexy frog on my neck is proof that their "won't tattoo if drunk" sign is bullshit!
Randomize