I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
She didn't know my name but she knew I was Canadian so she just called me Canada. It sounded like the national anthem when we were fucking.
Right now, my father is sitting on the couch, totally smashed, crying, eating pringles, and watching the credits of Transformers 2. Love him.
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
Uh yeah. I ate a brick of cheese. Didn't even cut it. We were admiring the teeth marks I was leaving. We decided it was the negative of my mouth
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
Randomize
