just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
Want me to give your number to an army recruiter?
I don't know... do you want me to use your number to sell used gay porn on Craigslist?
I sense beginning a prank war would end badly for both of us.
Just stabbed myself in the face trying to lick melted cheese off a kitchen knife.
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
I went to the strip club tonight. I had never gone, and in a panic I gave the dancer giving me a lap dance a handshake and introduced myself. Redefines business casual.
No more bourbon. Sleep now. I may die. Pray for me.
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
Randomize
