She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
Every time I there's a break up, I'm left with an animal. That's it. No more mutual pets.
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
Found a girl that was gonna make out with 25 people for her 25th birthday. I was like #12. Made top half!
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
Randomize
