is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
I just want you to know that if I ever had to fight man eating flowers or flying turtles to save my friends they'd be fucked. No one's worth all that bullshit. PS I really need to stop playing Wii while drunk.
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
I woke up in a hospital at three in the morning only to realize my pee is now going to be orange. I've grown to realize I've made all the right decisions
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize
