Just threw up at the table during our Father's Day dinner. And I managed to get quite a bit on dad, so that was nice.
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
Just so you know the unusual amount of skittles on your floor is entirely your own fault. You bought me 20 bags of them while I was high.
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
I just got a free round of shots. Don't you DARE fuckin tell me that A-cup boobs can't get you good things.
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
Isn't it funny how we're still best friends after that incident with the old lady in the bathroom
You fucking bailed on me. But I love you still
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
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