we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
Did I show you my penis last night?
She ate the cookie then went to the emergency room. Now her fam is pressing charges. Don't people understand you DON'T steal baked goods from potheads??
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
On a scale of 1 to "bad descision", where does stealing my racist neighbors dog and giving him my roomates dildo for a chew toy rate?
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
He said my vagina smelled like pomegranates. Its like my vagina is the fountain of youth.
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