she looked like the bat from fern gully.
Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
This chick had a microhand. Fucking, like, jerking off a baby carrot would make it look like corn.
I just set a reminder on my phone to get star spangled hammered this weekend.
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
Just bailed on her the best way possible. Got tickets to the game. Only issue is.... if we lose, we not only lost, but I skipped sex to watch us lose
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
Randomize
