I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
Trying to Jedi mind trick myself into not throwing up. This is not the esophagus you are looking for.
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
The cat is stealing cigarettes and my vagina cures blindness. How's your night?
I did it again.
I drunk texted John McCain.
I canceled a date last night to eat pop tarts and go to bed early
Randomize
