i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
My professor congratulated me on turning my assignment in early. I didn't have the heart to tell him I only passed it in early cause my sex plans got canceled for the night.
Randomize