no one should ever give us hovercrafts
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
Mike passed out early so we kept filling his mouth with redi-whip and letting the dog lick it out, but he started getting hives so we stopped.
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
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